Mates, it be Friday morning and yer Captain has much better things to do than spend time writing a blog.
But this is important, so Sunday's sermon can wait!
Last weekend the President ordered "bunker-busting" bombs dropped on Iranian nuclear sites.
He had talked about it for so long that Iran had time to move its nuclear materials to other facilities.
Bright and early the next morning Trump declared the sites were "totally obliterated!"
Iran's nuclear production was crippled for years to come.
U.S. intelligence disagreed. The international atomic energy people disagreed. Iran disagreed.
At best, the bombing set Iran back by about four months.
The President had a nuclear meltdown of his own, insisting U.S. intelligence was wrong. Everybody is wrong but him!
And in a bizarre twist, the administration is claiming critics are attacking the pilots of the B-2 bombers that delivered the payload.
"Shame on you!" says the draft-dodger who calls wounded and captured soldiers "Suckers and losers", who turns trips to Arlington National Cemetery into self-serving photo-ops, who has initiated significant cuts to the VA's budget, and who has ordered the VA to stop treating veterans who are Democrats.
After last weekend, Iran has even more reason to develop a nuclear weapon, as a deterrent to U.S. aggression, and Russia is cozying up to help.
As best anyone can tell, this was all staged as a distraction while Senate Republicans worked to for the President's Big Bullshit Bill through their side of the Capitol.
It's not going down easy.
But that's not what the Captain needs to write about today.
You may recall from earlier this month, the Trumpf family held a press conference to announce the creation and release of the first Trump cellphone and mobile phone service.
It is obviously being marketed to the MAGAt minions who ponied up their hard-earned Social Security checks to buy the Trump watch and the Trump Bible and the Trump tennis shoes and the Trump bitcoins and the...ad infinitum, ad nauseam...
In the initial announcement the phone was promised to be a T1 Phone 8002 "gold version" running on an Android platform. It was to have 12 GB RAM and a 6.78" AMOLED screen.
It would be emblazoned with an American flag and the Trump name, which just cries out for every sucker patriot in America to have to buy one!
And best of all, it would be made in the good ol' U.S. of A!
...unlike most every other product that bears the Trump name.
Critics, smelling a rat - or just the ever-present stench of a Trumpf grift - immediately pointed out that no cellphones are manufactured in the U.S. - ZERO! - and that it would take 2-3 years to build factories and go into production.
This is the same problem the President faces with all of his tariffs, which are supposed to be used to bring manufacturing back to the U.S. by artificially raising prices of imports.
CAPTAIN'S NOTE: Unfortunately, Trumpf is using tariffs to punish countries who have offended him or with which he disagrees. And he still pretends that tariffs are paid by the exporting company, not the U.S. consumer.
But you can't just pick up a manufacturing plant, move it to the U.S., and immediately start production.
Take, for example, Blue Oval City in Stanton, TN, a joint project by Ford Motor Company and SK Innovation to build electric pick up trucks. The $5.6 billion project was announced in 2021 - which means it was on the drawing board for many years prior. Four years later, it still hasn't produced the first vehicle.
Anyway, as expected, the MAGAt faithful lined up to order their Trump phones - $499 with $100 down - to be delivered sometime in September.
Yesterday it was reported there have been changes made to the Trump Phone website.
Pretty significant changes!
First, the website no longer claims the phones are made in the USA.
It now uses phrases like "Proudly American", "touched by American hands", and "designed with American values in mind".
Next it was noted that the promised RAM has been scrubbed.
And the screen size has been reduced by more than a 1/2 inch.
And the delivery date has been changed to sometime "this Fall"!
And do I need to say the "gold" case is not real gold?
I don't need to say that, do I?
I do?
Well, shit.
CAPTAIN'S NOTE: Yes, the Captain is aware that P.T. Barnum did not originate this quote. I am not one of those aforementioned suckers.
Mates, yer Captain can't tell you what to do with your money.
But $499 would buy a lot of Rum!
Even good Rum!
And in these unpredictable days ahead, you might need it.
The Rum, I mean.
Frankly, you would be wise to save what money you can for when this maladministration does take away your Social Security and Medicare.
What is it? What's that you say? He won't take your Social Security check? He won't take your Medicare?
Just wait.
And remember, the Captain warned you.
