Tuesday, October 29, 2019

Hallowe'en 2019


So this happened last night!


A couple weeks ago I found a pumpkin carving contest at one of the lakes communities on Facebook.


I checked. It was open to anyone of any age.

Captain’s Note: The Captain doesn’t go out of his way to beat little children out of prizes.

Our home is in a rural area and we don’t get Trick-or-Treaters, much to the Captain’s dismay.

For many years the Captain and First Mate were known for giving out full-size candy bars to the children who rang our doorbell.

Sadly, that first year here we had a lot of leftover candy to eat!

Last year I didn’t even carve a pumpkin, which was always my annual creative outlet.

I was despondent.
 
So I was thrilled to find this contest nearby.

I spent four hours working on it.

It was originally supposed to look like this:


But as I carved away, it began looking more “Jigaboo” than “Tiki”.

Captain’s Note: The Captain would throw the whole thing in the trash rather than have people think I’m a racist!

So I began making adjustments.

Then it started looking like a caricature of a Chinese person.

That wouldn’t do either!

On Monday afternoon I dropped off my entry.

There were just three other carved pumpkins there.


Captain’s Note: This morning a friend shared with me what he had always been told about racing: it doesn’t matter who DIDN’T show up; you still beat those who did!

At 3 p.m. the chamber of commerce posted again on Facebook, reminding the community they only had one more hour to submit their entries.

And they used a photo of my pumpkin in that announcement!

I felt pretty sure of my entry by that point.

A couple hours later the announcement was made: I won!

Along with Fame & Glory, the Captain will receive a $100 prize check!

That’ll buy a lot of candy corn, fer sure!


Captain's Note: The Captain loves candy corn! 

Haters gonna hate!



Wednesday, October 23, 2019

Election day 2019


Election Day 2019 is November 5th.

As always, the Captain says, “Go Vote!”

It is your right AND your duty!

The Captain will not tell you who to vote for; I’ve only done that once – 30 years ago! – and it backfired terribly.

Both of the candidates I supported won that year, but in the eyes of some in my congregation, every sermon after that was “a Democrat sermon”.

You know… all that stuff Jesus said about feeding the hungry, clothing the naked, etc.

Apparently, in the minds of some, when the Lord returns in final judgement and separates the sheep from the goats, it will be Democrats to the right, Republicans to the left. (See Matthew 25:31-46)


I determined at that point to not let politics interfere with my ministry. My calling. My job.

Oh, if you ask, the Captain will gladly share an opinion! But don’t look for yard signs or political sermons from the pulpit.

So, in yesterday’s mail was an unsolicited package.

Despite what the cover letter said, I did not order it.

The package contained 100 copies of a “non-partisan Voter’s Guide” – formatted as worship bulletin inserts – from Ralph Reed.

Ralph Reed. Conservative political activist.


Reed reportedly had a religious experience at a pub near Capitol Hill, frequented by staff and members of the House of Representatives.

That explains a lot right there!

In 1989, the young Reed was hired by the TV evangelist / Presidential hopeful Pat Robertson to be executive director of the poorly-named “Christian Coalition”. From that vantage point, Reed pushed numerous conservative Christian causes through the halls of Congress.

However, at one point he got greedy and became entangled with the likes of his old friend Jack Abramoff. 


In one instance, Abramoff secured Reed’s organization to rally the "3,000 pastors and 90,000 religious conservative households" in Alabama to oppose gambling at dog-racing tracks.

That’s an easy one! Most Christians oppose gambling. Reed secured a $20,000 per month retainer for his efforts.

But Abramoff’s lobbying firm was representing the interests of the Indian casinos, whose business might be affected by this expansion of gambling.   


In short, Abramoff used Reed and his fellow conservative Christians.

And Reed gladly pocketed the difference!

Later, Abramoff paid Reed to rally the U.S. Family Network, the Christian Coalition, and Focus on the Family to oppose the Indian Casinos themselves. This forced the tribes to pay Abramoff and his organization as much as $82 million to increase their lobbying efforts on behalf of the casinos!


Ralph Reed was not indicted for any of this – claiming ignorance of his long-time friend’s intentions – but it was noted that at one point he asked that the payments from the casinos be laundered through Grover Norquist’s “Americans for Tax Reform” organization.

Captain’s Note: Just “Google” names like Jack Abramoff, Grover Norquist, Tom DeLay, Michael Scanlon, etc.

After being found guilty of violations of campaign finance laws in three Congressional campaigns and one Presidential campaign during the 1990s, Reed left the Christian Coalition and started his own Faith and Freedom Coalition.

“Second verse, same as the first!”

In between, Reed was chair of the Georgia Republican Party, and in 2006 made a miserable attempt to become Lieutenant Governor of the state, despite having access to the Bush fundraising apparatus and his connection to the Christian Coalition.

All that to say, why in God’s name would the Captain hand out Ralph Reed’s “non-partisan” Voter’s Guide to my congregations?

“I’m Captain Dave and I do NOT endorse this ad!”

The voter's guides never made it past the trash can.

Mates, just read up on the candidates and the issues – from reliable sources! – and make up your own mind.

I understand. That’s a lot of work.

But you can do it!


Then, go vote!

Captain’s orders!