Do It Yourself!

There seems to be a small up-rising on social media. 

Another backlash against large corporations.

It doesn't mean a lot, but the Captain regularly gets condemning looks when I go to the self-check lane at Walmart. 

For me, self-check is a matter of convenience. I can get out of the store faster and I don't have to "chat" with a real person. 

"Oh, but you're doing away with jobs."

"Oh, but you're 'working' for the corporation."

Again, the Captain is getting out of the store faster...

And without having to talk to people.

So, for those of you who think the Captain is a terrible person - thank you! - let me ask you this:

When was the last time you called the operator to put your telephone call through?

Did you stop to think about the people you put out of work with your fancy self-dial phone?
 
Did you pump your own gas today? 

Did you stop to think of all the gas jockeys you put out of work?

Did you buy a newspaper on your way to work?

What about that newsboy who needs the work?

Did you type your own letters on your computer? Send your own emails?

What about all the girls in the secretarial pool you put out of work?
 
Did you stop by your ATM to get cash today?

How many bank tellers did you put out of work?

Did you buy something from Amazon today?

Don't you know that's why the malls are closing?

Did you fly somewhere today? I know you used the self-check-in kiosk there.

Did you think about the poor ticket-desk employees you put out of work?

Did you eat at a buffet tonight? Salad bar? [Gag!]

Think about all those poor waitresses you put out of work!

The Captain's point is this: all of this is progress. 

You may not like it at the moment, but given time, it will become as natural as buying your groceries at a store instead of growing your own.

Oh snap! There I go again!

And here's the reality as it relates to Walmart:

So the Captain will continue to self-check. Thank you for your concern.

 

Git-R-Done!

As I write this, I am sitting in the cockpit of The Tiki Hut.

Not going anywhere; I just love my boat!

It is a beautiful, sunny day.

Made tolerable by an electric fan and a cold beverage.

“The Exotic Music of Gene Rains” is playing on the stereo.

This is how I rest... relax.. re-create...

My stomach has been ripped up for the last week or so, so I’m also eating my yogurt.

Because Jamie Lee Curtis told me I should.

The conditions at the marina haven’t changed much since last the Captain wrote. The management tells me they want to “do it right”, so it will take time… Proposals are being considered by the corporate mucky-mucks… I should expect some announcement in the next two weeks…

Everything I expected to hear.

I check in with them periodically, putting forth my best smile, trying to demonstrate my friendly, cooperative attitude.

I’m hoping they will keep their word that the Captain will get his pick of slips when it is all said and done.

Meanwhile, the big boats are expanding their decks and dock bars.

It’s beginning to look like they’re settling in for the long haul.

But that is not the topic of the Captain’s post today.

The county Sheriff’s office just made a big announcement!

They are ordering new patrol cars.

I know, right!?!

The new Sheriff (elected in 2016) was quoted in the press release as saying, “During my campaign I promised we would get things done.”

So, after more than two years, they are buying new cars. 

In a different color…

Wuh?

And the citizens of the county went wild!

Captain's Note: The high school colors are orange and blue.

“Huzzah!” they cried! “Our new sheriff is so wonderful!” they exclaimed!

WTF!

Oh, but that’s not all, mateys!

If it were as simple as a paint color, I’m sure it would have been done years ago!

No, what elicited the most favorable responses from the citizens of this fair county is the addition of a decal across the rear bumper:

People were in tears when they heard about the addition of these four little words!

"In God We Trust"

I shit you not!

Captain’s Note: I know the previous sheriff personally. He is a fine Christian man. A Baptist. But for some reason, he couldn’t bring himself to adding those four  idolatrous treasured words to the patrol cars.

And that right there is probably what caused him to lose the election.

When it came to doing his job, I’m pretty sure the former sheriff trusted in his deputies and a trunk full of firearms.

Nonetheless, the county will soon be safe again because the sheriff’s department has more colorful cruisers and “In God We Trust” stickers.

Your Captain can sleep in peace once more…

Change

“We can't be afraid of change. You may feel very secure in the pond that you are in, but if you never venture out of it, you will never know that there is such a thing as an ocean, a sea. Holding onto something that is good for you now, may be the very reason why you don't have something better.” 

― C. JoyBell C.

Yes, everything changes.

Such has been the Captain’s life since… well, pretty much since high school.

A new town every four years on average.

Which means living in a different house. 

With different furniture.

And different paint colors. 

My choice.

Sometimes just because.

Truth be told, your Captain generally embraces change.

It keeps life interesting.

But it’s funny how a little storm can change all that.

The F-1 tornado that hit our marina in mid-June has changed everything.

In an attempt to keep the marina operational and try to put things back together, the management has shuffled boats around to different piers.

And while the Captain’s pier was not significantly damaged, the management has deemed it necessary to accommodate the “Big Money” boats from the damaged piers.

The Tiki Hut has been moved three different times to make space for a much bigger boat.

To be fair, the marina was hit by a tornado. One can expect a period of disarray. I’ve tried to be cooperative and understanding as the marina carries out the necessary repairs.

But the boats they have moved to Pier 4 have totally changed the makeup of the pier.

What had once been a quiet pier full of pontoon boats has now become Party Central!

Weekends are now loud and rowdy with lights and loud music.

Country music!

And strangers sitting out on the pier smoking and drinking beer.

And from the development I’ve seen this week, they’re planning to stay.

But the greatest insult of all… as the Captain struggled to squeeze my 8-foot beam into my allotted 10 feet of space without damaging the party barge next to me...

...a 34-foot Sea Ray with an 8 ½-foot beam effortlessly eased into the open 20-foot slip next to me.

Now, one might ask why he gets the whole slip when he’s only ½ foot wider? Maybe because his Sea Ray cost about $120,000 more than mine…

One can only hope that once boating season is over the repairs to the piers will progress much faster.

Today there were three electricians working on Pier 4.

I saw them standing by their truck. I saw them sitting on the end of the pier. I saw them standing by their truck. Then they went home.

I did not see them actually DO anything!

Captain's Note: In fairness to them, it was a warm day.

 But if you're not actually going to do anything, why bother showing up...?

Your Captain only hopes that these noisy interlopers in their big boats will return to whatever boating hell they came from and Pier 4 will become the quiet haven it once was.

Here’s to Summer 2020.