Desperation

Still unable to get his “Wall”, last week in one of his daily fits of anger, President Trumpf threatened to close the border between the U.S. and Mexico. That would effectively stop illegal immigration from the south, right?

Probably not.

But what it would stop is the importation of a large amount of produce which we rely upon, not the least of which is Mexican Avocados!

Yes, 90% of the Avocados we eat come from Mexico. California makes up a small percentage, but their crops were damaged by the extreme heat of 2018 so it is not clear how much California will be able to come up with this year.

And then there’s Florida. But Florida Avocados are not really Avocados, so don’t let anyone fool you!

Mates, this is serious! It may be time to outfit The Tiki Hut for black-market Avocado smuggling!

But that is only part of the desperation that has been in the news of recent.

On Friday, former Nevada Assemblywoman Lucy Flores (D) made public her discomfort with then-Vice President Joe Biden during a campaign rally in 2014.

In her words:

     I felt him get closer to me from behind. He leaned further in and inhaled my hair. I was mortified. I thought to myself, “I didn’t wash my hair today and the vice-president of the United States is smelling it. And also, what in the actual fuck? Why is the vice-president of the United States smelling my hair?” He proceeded to plant a big slow kiss on the back of my head. My brain couldn’t process what was happening. I was embarrassed. I was shocked. I was confused. There is a Spanish saying, “tragame tierra,” it means, “earth, swallow me whole.” I couldn’t move and I couldn’t say anything. I wanted nothing more than to get Biden away from me. My name was called and I was never happier to get on stage in front of an audience.

 

That revelation has been played out in the media like Biden is a sexual deviant, assaulting women across the map.

In fact, the Daily KOS dug up similar dirt:

     Flores’s experience isn’t unique. It is no secret in Washington that Biden has touched numerous women inappropriately in public. It’s just never been treated as a serious issue by the mainstream press.

     Biden’s been caught on camera embracing a female reporter from behind and gripping her above her waist, just below her bust. At a swearing-in ceremony for Defense Secretary Ash Carter, Biden put his hands on the shoulders of Stephanie Carter, Carter’s wife, and then leaned in and whispered into her ear. (He’s whispered into many women’s ears.) He’s also touched women’s faces and necks during other photo ops. Once at a swearing-in ceremony for a US senator, he held the upper arm of the senator’s preteen daughter, leaned down and whispered into her ear, as she became visibly uncomfortable. Then he kissed the side of her forehead, a gesture that made the girl flinch.

Really? Is that the best you’ve got?

He placed his hand between her waist and her bust? Are you suggesting it should have been firmly planted on one or the other?

Watch that hand, Joe!

He whispered in the ear of a woman? Did he whisper “sweet nothings” or words of encouragement?

He touched a woman’s face? (I don’t even know where to go with this one…)

He kissed a pre-teen girl on the forehead… and she flinched?

What pre-teen doesn’t flinch when her grandpa kisses her?

Just so you know, Stephanie Carter, into whose ear Biden has whispered, insists this photo does not tell the real story.

She has come out to publicly to tell the truth behind this photo that has been circulated on social media of recent. She counts Joe as a family friend and appreciated his presence and support during her husband’s swearing-in ceremony. She felt there was nothing inappropriate about his hands on her shoulders or whispering in her ear.

And neither does her husband.

Here’s one of what appears to be a full-on kiss between Biden and Hillary Clinton from 2016.

Is Harry Reid jealous?

Friends, Joe Biden is not drugging women so he can sleep with them, like Bill Cosby did.

He might be accused of being sexist or paternalistic, but your Captain doesn’t see “assault” in any form; and so far no one has reported that he was looking for sexual favors just because he was the Vice-fookin’-President of the United States.

And he certainly isn’t bragging about “grabbin’ ‘em by the pussy!” like our current adulterous Embarrassment-in-Chief has done!

Just so you know, Joe Biden has been married twice. His first wife, Neilia, died in a tragic car accident in 1972, and by all reports Joe has been faithful to his second wife, Jill, since their marriage in 1977.

Again, unlike the man sitting in the Oval Office today who will likely again be the Republican candidate in 2020.

I dare say, Trumpf and his enablers have sufficiently lowered the bar for any who would follow after him.

So what is this attack on Biden all about?

Well, he’s teasing about running for President in 2020.

He’s an older candidate (he’ll be 77 this year), but he is about the most likeable politician in Washington right now.

And when someone’s popular, the opposition has to work harder to find “dirt” on her/him.

As they tried with Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez…

Yes, this is the candidate "dancing" when she was in college.

 

And more recently with Beto O’Rourke, another potential candidate for President…

This one was photo-shopped - even the right-wingers who shared it on social media admit that - which is an even greater sign of desperation.

These attacks are simply an act of desperation by people who fear the potential likelihood of a strong candidate to challenge Trumpf in 2020.

Slander them early and often before they can share their ideas.

Your Captain cannot say for sure that this is anything new in politics. I suspect it is not. But I yearn for the day when we can hear a free exchange of ideas about how to better our nation and the lives of our citizenry rather than the seemingly never-ending vomit of lies and inuendo in an attempt to win-over a populace steeped in “National Enquirer”-style illiteracy.

No critical thinking skills.

In the 1983 hit “The Big Chill”, Jeff Goldblum’s character, Michael, is a writer for People Magazine.

He explains his job: “Well where I work we only have one editorial rule. You can't write anything longer than it takes your average person to take an average crap.”

Indeed.

Mates, these are desperate times in which we are living! Don’t let bullshit like this distract you from the prize.

Captain's Update: If you've been following the Captain's "rash" saga, it's not over yet. In a latest attempt to find the cause, I have gone without wine for five days now, living on Rum, Tequila, Vodka and Gin. I'm thinking it might be a food allergy. Much to your Captain's dismay, the rash has diminished in recent days.

Good God! It can't be that!